darklord A mailman on his last day before retirement is astonished when he’s greeted at the front door by one of the young housewives on his route wearing a skimpy little robe. She drags him in the house and almost before he knows what’s happening she’s straddling him on the couch, unfastening his pants. Things progress as you might expect, but almost the minute he finishes, she dashes to the kitchen and returns with a plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies and an envelope containing a nice card and a $20 bill. Astonished, he asks “What’s all this?” The young woman explains: “I told my husband you were retiring and asked what we should do for you, and my husband said ‘fuck him, give him twenty bucks or something.’ The cookies were my idea!”